This spring, everyone was excited for the new musical that ChardonHigh School would be performing. It was going to be filled with fun, excitement, and of course, singing. However, this performance was more than that. Undeniably, Pippin from ChardonHigh School was the worst performance that the school has ever done.
There are many things that are terrible about this musical, and I am eager to share them all. First and foremost, the main idea of the play itself is outrageous. Pippin is a prince, and he is trying to find his purpose in life. He’s already going to become a king, so what else is there to ask for? He tries to be like his dumb brother and go to war with the other dumb soldiers, who are fighting about the most ridiculous cause imaginable: God. Pippin ends up going to war, and successfully killing someone, yet he is too much of a baby to keep killing like a true war hero. He has to ask his own grandma for advice, and she tells him that the small things in life make him happy. However, Pippin is going to be king! Why need the small things when you are KING?! Alright, back to the story. Pippin now is engulfed with a plethora of beautiful females. This would be any man’s dream. However, Pippin again makes the mistake to run away from this blessing. His gift from God obviously isn’t enough for him; he is not enough of a man to handle all of that bust. Finally, Pippin does something generally okay. He kills his dad to become king: smart move for someone that dumb. Well, anyways, Pippin is considered the best king of the land, since he abolishes taxes, gives peasants land, and stops any kind of wars. Guess what? He takes it all back, and renounces his kingly-ness. After this, he falls into a giant spiral of depression. He meets a girl, and his son, which make him happy for a little while, but he again makes the mistake to leave. She’s never going to take that man back, right? We’ll see. So, finally, Pippin actually is given the best opportunity of all: the chance to fulfill the grand finale! All he has to do is become one with the flame, and he would have been the best person to ever live! There are costumes, dancers, make-up, anything a king could ask for and more. Honestly, I bet by now you can predict what he did. He goes back against his word, and does not complete this spectacular finale. Pippin simply gets rid of everything, stripped down to his underwear. He chooses the simplest life over anything else, and the play ends. Yep, that’s it.
Even the people involved in the play were disappointed. Junior Ashley Konya is in the Props crew, and she revealed, “I was forced to be in it.” Senior Charlie Blaser said, “I was going to go see it, but I heard it completely sucked.” Our own newspaper staff writer Ryan Watts was there on Thursday, and he had this to say. “It was way too loud, long, depressing, and it made me want to burn myself like Pippin was about to do.” Even Mr. L, the director of the musical, had this to say. “Well, I tried my hardest. Pippin was a failure. I shouldn’t even bother anymore. I quit school. I quit life. I’m going to sleep.”
The next time our school thinks about performing a play or musical, I think we should think twice.